Lerra

2:55 PM, Dear Diary,

Sunday, October 19, 2008

Have been feeling empty lately. Not really sure of the reason why.

Tangled up in a whole swamp of confusion, i've yet to know what my true feelings are.

I really wish that i could have the courage to confess something to him.

I guess what's holding me back is the fear of rejection, or maybe the embarrassment.

In the past, i held myself back too much and because of the previous relationship i had, i didn't want to get into another, afraid that it'll not last and the uncertainty of our future.

But now, thinking back, why was i so dumb?

I can only blame myself for being such a silly idiot, not knowing to grab the opportunity when it stood there, rightsmack infront of me.

I let the opportunity slip through my hands, just like that.

No matter how much i've regretted and hated myself for being stupid stupid STUPID, its never gonna crawl back to me.

I wish he could call me darling again, just once and i'll be contented.

Although i've been telling myself to forget him, ignore him and stop noticing him, it seems like a total impossible task for me cos i've tried it and i miss him even more.

I feel like a total loser now._.

I don't even know whether i love him or is it just pure infatuations or...is it just about a crush?

Screw it! Urgh!

Last week at cineleisure with jiarong & jessy! Jessy was really cute that day and jiarong, our entertainer. I had fun, great fun with them :D

Get ready while i bombard my post with all my unglam pics .!

TADA!

Lols, my jiao bin :x While jes looked so glam, i looked like a retard.

Still looking like a total retard. That's jiarong on the left :D

The fries were tasty, not the corn though :x (i look like i have small eyes,but I DON'T HOR!! )

JiaRong:"THE ICECREAM IS REALLLLLY NICE CAN, OMG OMG OMG!!!"

His reaction is totally hilarious lar!!! ( i look like i have small eyes again >.> cos my double eyelid went poof! that day.... )

See,i said jessy looked super cute c:

Jiarong's NEWS album. Cute lar the cover!

Me: WHAT!! Jiarong: *hai* - shuts his eyes. in his own world -

Spazzing over the album like as if its mine when its not >.>

Jiarong: = . = - whatever -

That's jessy's stitch and i have a problem with stitch. It freaks me out :X

Oi, look at the camera lei jiarong =_=

Ahahaah! There he is, looking very scared or shocked? Or is he in trauma. I don..t know =X

I wish this was my hp dp :D Kinda cool huh?

Hohoho, I've got a solo pic ! Okaye, im not a greedy bish, blame the timer of the neo machine. SO FAST FOR WHAT!? MAKE PEOPLE KAN CHIONG ONLY :x

Sorry for the blurry neoprints :x My scanner is kinda sucky.

Dumbness, sillyness and stupidity, please get away from me :x

Still in self denial, with a glimpse of hope that he'll come back to me.